Why people dislike wannabes

The word "wannabe" is generally used as a pejorative term, referring to those who strive to be something they are not. This term is generally used on people who are trying to pretend to be cooler than they actually are, and is thrown with great distaste.

However, let us analyze the matter more carefully. Why is it intrinsically a bad thing to wish to be something one is currently not? If an average student aspires to be an outstanding one, or an ordinary athlete strives to become an Olympian, nobody looks down on them for that. There must be something more to our distaste than this.

Consider the fact - when people wish to improve themselves in manners which benefit society as a whole, such as studies, athletics or scientific and artistic research, the general attitude towards it is encouraging, even if they fall short of their mark we honor them for trying. The "wannabe" word is thrown when the manner of improvement does not benefit society as a whole. For instance, a guy trying to be a player in terms of getting girls (but not succeeding) is laughed at and regarded as a wannabe, as is a girl who tries to dress and act like the top cheerleaders (although she is not in that circle). In other words, they are fighting for social status, in a rather obvious way, and not quite making it.

Due to social status being a zero-sum affair, other people ascending naturally makes us descend, relatively speaking. This is especially true in more enclosed environments such as schools. Therefore, when people attempt to increase their status quickly in a short period of time, such as the wannabes as mentioned above, the instinctive reaction of everyone else is to fight against it. This causes a strong feeling of antipathy.

In the olden days where bloodline and aristocracy determined one's rank in society, the older families used to look down on those who had just risen to prominence, calling them derogatory terms such as "nouveau riche" (new money). The exact same psychology applies to the dislike towards the so-called "wannabes" of today.

An offer

I got an job offer recently. The pay was somewhat better, but not a whole lot better - so I rejected it. I will not budge unless I get a 50% increment!

To some extent, I feel I owe loyalty to my company as they gave me a start in a fairly good line when I was just a lowly fresh grad and knew nothing. Is this loyalty as ironclad as that of Japanese employees in the past? No, I have my price too and for the right price I will move, however this time I did not get the right price. Sorry.

Somehow I feel very comfortable with my workplace. Familiar faces, seniors to run to when I have no idea what to do, etc. I worry that this is the comfort zone people speak of, and that I have fallen into it, as every time I think of leaving the company for other opportunities I feel slightly reluctant.

I guess if one day I have to leave then I must think of the lousy coffee vending machines to give me impetus.